Confessions of a Shopaholic, Break-in Edition

All I want to do since the break-in is spend.  I want to just go CRAZY buying things.  I don't know exactly what it is, I'm sure there is research done explaining this reaction (Kenneth Cole, I thank you).  But ever since the day we got home and found the house had been invaded, I just want to buy things.  I want to buy magazines, and I've already subscribed to four since the break-in.  I justify it because it's for the studio/parents, which is true, but I just needed to BUY things.  Online, in person, doesn't matter.  I want to throw everything out and replace it with all new stuff. Obviously that isn't going to happen, so I'm just going nuts with all this pent-up energy that needs to be spent, literally, but don't have the funds to do it.  I want new clothes.  I want to replace all the underwear they went through.  I want to go and buy a big ole gold bracelet to replace Dad's bracelet.  I still can't handle that they took it.  It's the only thing I got of his when he passed away 11 years ago.  I despise them for taking it.  Yet I don't.  But TOtally do.  I want to buy a new one.  But can't.  I want a new iPod so I can go walking with music again.  I want to play music in the studio on a new laptop but can't.  It's making me a bit crazy.  I'm trying to get my head around it and see the best- no one was hurt.  No one is sick.  They only took very specific things.  All that stuff.  But like, how about the ruby ring with two little diamonds that dad bought me when I was like, 10?  WHY DID THEY NEED TO TAKE THAT?  I hate them.  But I don't.  But totally do. 

I want to buy books and fill the shelves with them.  I don't even need to read them.  I just want to buy them.  I want to buy a new couch and new rugs and new cutlery.  I want to buy piles of DVD's to replace all the movies we had on the laptop for Benjamin. 

I want to buy clothes.  SO many clothes.  I want new shirts, new jeans, new boots.  It's very specific the things that I want to buy.  I don't want coats or scarves or CD's or anything.  No earrings.  I want rings and bracelets and shirts and books.  I can't stop thinking about buying things, like, just PILES of stuff.  It's driving me nuts.

And now the dreams have started.  Couldn't sleep all night.  Every noise is someone trying to get in, to get at us, to take more.